16 February 2015

9/2015 You are my Literature


My first Publication
I live in my ownstyle, when I'm alone and desperate. Writing down all of my life, thoughts, feelings and exposing in this small blogspot world. May be useless. Even though, it spreads all over the world to those who open their heart and follow this link.

It's about my life, my style and my relations, who enter into my life whether they are close or far away now. It doesn't matter where they are. It doesn't matter who they are. It doesn't matter whether they had read or not read. It doesn't matter they feel ashamed of it or proud of themselves. But, i really enjoy this blogging because it is the only way of telling the world that i am still alive. 

Sometimes, i feel uncomfortable of exposing my entire backside (as bad-side is easy to remember) events, happy moments etc. Sometimes, afraid to expose my private affairs and whatever i thought. May be, ashamed of it. However, i feel relax and comfort when i ventilate my problems, my feelings as nobody accept me as i am ( I always telling and confessing to Dear Lord). I feel happy when i received some rare responses and feedbacks, especially when asking some hidden things i had not written.

I want to remember all of my past and my opinions. I don't want to forget all such things happen to me, what i had experienced in Life. That is why i share. It helps me to recall those things. I can recall the then period. I want to live in a peaceful and harmonious life, what i really mean is that i don't want  to spend with hatred and anger. Instead of hatred and anger, i want to miss a person in his/her own way of living. I am hurt if i'd hurt someone whom i never know the reason. I feel helpless when i am weak and damn cool. I don't want you to remember me like careless guy but like to be a man of a lonely person. When you have time to think your past, you may think of the hardest moments which make you cry or the happiest moments you met in life, you should be appreciated for you have met and solved such obstacles.

One of my principle is that 'follow your heart not your conscience.' I may regret what i choose/decide but i dont want to feel sorry because i had already chosen that way. Then, If I have guilty feelings, i asked dear God for his forgiveness. Sometimes, when feeling that moment helps me to relief my paint. If that feeling does not make any sense to me, i feel, dream it and share to whomever it concerns.

As Grandpa told me a story in my early childhood. "A young Korean Criminal guy felt himself Guilty and desperate. He reported himself to the Judge for his punishment. But the Judge replied, No one reported you, and therefore we, Korea do not have such punishments in accordance with the Law" Likewise, Christian should submit us to heavenly father for his Punishments and Rewards.

Being a lonely bachelor who is fond of reading and writing, i’d like to preserve my literatures for recalling and sharing. I don't care who ever read it; from wherever. I dont care what they are remarking my damned feelings and thoughts. The only why i was never stop blogging is that i want to feel those things again and want to share it. It is hard to recall.

Last but not the least; i appreciate for your reading. (Especially for your feedbacks and comments)

(P.S This is the first update of my old blogspot- Put Chhuak (2010) which was hacked by my Ex BF. I cant remember the exact date when I was writing. Checking again but preserve the original simple writings. Then updated again)

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